Speedrun – Completing a Game as Quickly as Possible
How a Nerd Would Describe It
Imagine you’ve got a cherished video game that you’ve spent countless hours playing, savoring every minute of the storyline, side quests, and hidden Easter eggs. Now toss all that sentimental stuff out the window! A speedrun is about blitzing through that game like your pants are on fire, aiming to finish in the shortest time possible. It’s the video game equivalent of a mad dash to the bathroom after too much coffee. 🏃♂️💨
Speedrunners are those brave souls who skip dialogue, exploit glitches, and perfect every move to shave off milliseconds. It’s a wild ride, akin to watching a squirrel on Red Bull. 🤪
Details
Stopwatch Culture ⏱️
Speedrunning is not just about mashing buttons as fast as you can—oh no, it’s an intricate dance involving strategy, precision, and a smidge of insanity. The community often divides speedruns into categories like:
- Any%: Finish the game by any means necessary. Glitches, bugs, and magic spells are all fair game.
- 100%: Collect every collectible, complete every side quest, and still finish faster than a caffeinated cheetah.
- Glitchless: Complete the game without exploiting any glitches. This is for purists who prefer their speedruns "organic."
Tool-Assisted Speedruns (TAS) 🛠️
TAS involves using software tools to create a "perfect" run. Think of it as hiring a cyborg to do your homework. It’s a fascinating sub-genre where human skill meets digital precision. Some argue it’s cheating, but hey, who doesn’t want a robot sidekick?
Other Similar Words Which Nerds Use
RTA (Real-Time Attack): Completing the game in real-time, without pausing or using slow-motion software.
PB (Personal Best): Your best time. It’s the gamer equivalent of a gold star on your elementary school homework.
WR (World Record): The fastest known time anyone has ever completed a specific game. It’s the Holy Grail of speedrunning.
Splits: These are checkpoints or segments within a run, where speedrunners track their progress. Think of it like running a marathon but with more respawning enemies.
Glitch: An unintended flaw in the game, often exploited by speedrunners to save time. It’s like finding a loophole in your gym membership.
👍 Correct Usage
- "I’m going to try a speedrun of Super Mario 64 this weekend. Wish me luck!"
- "Wow, I just watched an Any% speedrun of The Legend of Zelda. It was mind-blowing!"
- "My PB in Donkey Kong Country is 45 minutes, but I’m aiming for sub-40."
🛑 Wrong Usage
- "I speedrun to work every day to beat traffic." (Nice try, but no. That’s just called being late.)
- "Let’s speedrun this meeting." (While we all wish this were possible, it’s not quite the same thing.)
- "I speedran my taxes last night." (Please, for the love of all things holy, don’t do this.)
The Speedrunning Phenomenon
How It Actually Is
Speedrunning isn’t just a hobby—it’s a lifestyle. The community is worldwide, with forums, YouTube channels, and Twitch streams dedicated to dissecting every frame and pixel of a game. They even have marathons like Games Done Quick (GDQ), where speedrunners raise millions for charity while showcasing their skills. 🎮❤️
Advantages and Disadvantages
Advantages
- Skill Development: Speedrunning requires incredible hand-eye coordination and strategic planning. You’ll become a ninja with a controller. 🥷
- Community: The speedrunning community is supportive and tight-knit. You’ll make friends who understand your obsession with saving frames.
- Charity: Events like GDQ raise money for great causes. You can save lives while shaving seconds off your run!
Disadvantages
- Time-Consuming: Mastering a speedrun can take hundreds, if not thousands, of hours. Say goodbye to your social life. 👋
- Frustration: One tiny mistake can ruin an entire run. Prepare to rage-quit more than once.
- Health Risks: Long hours of practice can lead to repetitive strain injuries. Stretch those fingers, folks!
More Jargon to Impress Your Friends
RNG (Random Number Generator) 🎲
RNG refers to the elements of a game that are determined by chance. It’s like rolling dice to decide enemy behavior or item drops. Speedrunners often pray to the RNG gods for favorable outcomes.
Frame-Perfect
Executing an action with such perfect timing that it occurs within a single frame of the game. This is the gaming equivalent of threading a needle while riding a unicycle.
Reset
Starting over from the beginning, often after a mistake. Expect to hear this word a lot in speedrunning streams, usually followed by a deep sigh or a string of creative curse words.
Route Planning
The meticulous process of deciding the most efficient path through a game. Think of it as a GPS for gamers, but with more lava pits and boss fights.
Common Questions
How do I start speedrunning?
First, choose a game you love (or used to love before it broke your spirit). Watch some speedruns of that game to understand the strategies involved. Then, practice, practice, practice. Join forums and communities for tips and support. And remember, patience is key!
Is speedrunning only for old games?
Absolutely not! While many speedruns focus on classics like Super Metroid or The Legend of Zelda, modern games are also popular. The techniques may differ, but the thrill is the same.
Do speedrunners make money?
Some do! Popular speedrunners can earn money through Twitch subscriptions, donations, and sponsorships. Events like GDQ also offer opportunities for fame and fortune (well, mostly fame).
Conclusion
Speedrunning is a thrilling, frustrating, and deeply rewarding pursuit. It’s about more than just finishing a game quickly; it’s about pushing the limits of what’s possible, one pixel at a time. Whether you’re a seasoned veteran or a curious newbie, the world of speedrunning welcomes you with open arms—and probably a controller-shaped callus or two. 🎮
So, grab your favorite game, set that timer, and dive into the exhilarating madness of speedrunning. Just remember to stretch those fingers and maybe keep a stress ball nearby. Ready, set, GO! 🚀
